24 August 2009

What I {Stole The Soul Of } Today

My dad once told us that we couldn't take pictures of the dog.
"Don't take pictures of the damn dog. You'll steal her soul."

Sorry Ginger.

But to be truthful this isn't the first time I've stolen her poor soul. A few years she got a haircut...

It was hilarious.

The funny thing is, I bet my dad wishes he never said such a thing. He's been parading around the house with a plaque that says,

“Life begins when the kids leave and the dog dies.”
He's still waiting...

I'm pretty sure my sister never believed Ginger even had a soul to begin with.

Many members of the family weren't really on board with Ginger in the beginning. She had a wild and reckless youth that put a bad taste in some people's mouth.

But Ginge and I go way back.

It was Ginger that showed me that I don't handle panic situations very well.

(long story.)

You can call me crazy, but I think she's kinda cute.

Those dramatic eyes with the heavy khol like liner. So Cleopatra.

The bushy tail and mismatched body part lengths.

That floppy tongue and slimy nose.

She just always looks happy. I like that.

She's always chewing on her paws though. That's weird.

So Gingie Girl and I were hanging out in the back yard today and decided to go look for some other souls to steal.

Seriously? It surprises you that we have gnomes in the yard?

If we have them inside, why would we dare neglect the outside?

You may be thinking to yourself, “Gnomes have no soul.”

Well, a Goosebumps book I read in second grade begs to differ.

You may also be asking yourself, “What is that large gray thing in the picture?”

That my friends is a ceramic sculpture gone terribly terribly wrong.

My family calls them the elephant legs. It hurts, but I laugh.

I can't even begin to explain this so I will just tell you exactly what it is ... a totem pole with a rooster cut out on top of it.

I still haven't read the camera user manual...

“Avian Bird Flu”

aka “My Biggest Fear”

Watchya lookin at Ginger?

Ah yes, the green cement porcupine statue. Everyone has one of these ... right?

Ok, bye Ginger! It's time to move to the front yard...

pa-the-tic

This kills me.

This shouldn't surprise you.

We love America and cheap lawn decorations made in China.

Tacky though they may be. The bunnies have a special place in my heart.

We have had them for as long as I can remember. In the same spot, for as long as I can remember.

Sure, some limbs have taken a hit or two, but we always glue them right back on.

The end.

That was long.

Sorry.

1 comment:

  1. i read that goosebumps book. those damn gnomes still give me nightmares and yet i will always insist on having them in my hypothetical yard.

    ReplyDelete

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